I sometimes forget that God is omnipresent. I mean it is God and I know that. But for me, I think it is harder to believe. God was there in the beginning. All the way back in Genesis 1:1 and even before then. God is here now. With me as I sit on this front porch step in San Vicente, El Salvador. And God is there in the future. Whatever the future holds. He is there at the end. Victorious.
I’ve really been struggling as of recently with these thoughts of God being here with me and guiding me along into my future. At times in my life, I have been so certain of what path God wants me to take. Whether or not to be in a relationship, whether or not to do an 11 month mission trip called the World Race, and whether or not to stay in Colorado or move somewhere. I guess I can safely say that God has been guiding my life these past few years and it has been great. I wish I still felt that way. I am pretty sure I am going through a ‘dry season’ of God talking to me… which is irritating me because I could really use some help right now God!
Anyway, so this has been something I’ve been dealing with and it was until yesterday evening that I was kind of stressing about it. It was during our free day at the lake house when somehow I ended up all alone. I lay in the hammock and put on my ipod. One of the first songs was by Casting Crowns. As I sat listening, my eyes were opened and I heard me being able to say this to God one day:
When I'm lost in the mystery
To You my future is a memory
'Cause You're already there
You're already there
Standing at the end of my life
Waiting on the other side
And You're already there
You're already there
So at the end of my life- when I am able to kneel at the throne of God in all His glory, this is what I want. To look back and see the pieces of my life fitting together. To see the ups and downs all winding together to create a love story like never before. To know and believe with confidence that God was Already There. At this current moment of confusion and quietness in my life, seeing that God was there working to complete the puzzle of His plan for my life. And though I am still a little confused and lost in my current journey, I will continue to take one step at a time and trust that God is there and when something major in my life is beginning to happen, He will let me know once again what to do.
So in advance for that. Thanks God.
